Cellardyke Bathing Pool, Fife

The Cardinal's Steps, Cellardyke

Cellardyke in the East Neuk of Fife is not notable for many things. Home to influential musicians, the Fence Collective and Britain's first case of bird flu it's an otherwise unremarkable place, almost imperceptible from Anstruther, its bigger brasher neighbour. But somehow we end up there a lot, overlooking an old bathing pool staring out to sea.

The pool was once known as The Cardinal's Steps after Cardinal Beaton of St Andrews who had a seaside residence here in the 16th century. It was developed into a formal bathing pool in the 1930s by local volunteers. A postcard in St Andrews University archive shows it in its full glory with a tall diving platform and rows of bathing huts filling the space now occupied by a caravan site. What's more, there were people in it, which is something you don't see today.

Tidal bathing pools used to be common up and down the coast. Hardy souls thought nothing of taking a plunge in the North Sea. Although a few remain in use, like the famous "Trinkie" in Wick, they only tend to survive in the south of England where the weather is more forgiving. Today the pool lies broken at the bottom, crumbling at the sides and slippery round the edges. Despite a few forays round the outside to peer into the depths the pool's latest visitors - four 19th century cannons are invisible to the naked eye. These have been deposited here by St Andrew's University School of Chemistry to experiment on corrosion rates. According to their website the fact that the Cellardyke pool is intact and relatively sheltered makes it a perfect laboratory.

This puts paid to any idea of salvaging it as a swimming pool. I have seen kids in there, but wouldn't fancy sending my own in. There probably isn't much call really, now that Cellardyke is no longer the holiday destination it once was. Instead when we come we don't swim, we play in the park beside it where the swings have a lovely sea view. Failing that, we just sit and look out to sea.

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Mablethorpe Crazy Golf, Lincolnshire

Mablethorpe Crazy Golf

I’ve heard there are families that don’t stop at every crazy golf course they see when driving around the country. I’ve heard about them but I’m not sure they exist. How would they fill their seaside days if they’re not knocking golf balls through windmills, houses and into top hats? I just can’t imagine. Anyway. Suffice to say that we are quite the crazy golf connoisseurs and you should believe us when we assert that this crazy golf course in Mablethorpe is as close to perfection as you’ll ever find. Well worth traversing the barren nothingness of Lincolnshire to get there.

As you’ll know from your extensive experience of crazy golf courses, there’s an increasing tendency for course owners to get some off-the-shelf, plastic holes from a warehouse somewhere, blot them to a bit of concrete and call it a top-flight course. We’re always disappointed by this approach. We’ll always play on them but there’s nothing as exciting as a truly individual home-made course like this one. It’s not just amusements, it’s folk art. The colours, the ideas and the friendliness make it a lovely place to spend half an hour.

Our favourite hole is probably the enormous Humber Bridge, a vast hole which provides a challenge for even the most skilled minigolfer. But you can’t fault the house with boots and a moustache, the fat boy or the cannon. And the coup de gras is of course the final hole which will squirt water at you when you get your ball in. Genius. Andy Miller in his marvelous book Tilting At Windmills, chronicles his time attempting to get good at crazy golf. He visits a lot of courses. And he shares our enthusiasm declaring Mablethorpe Crazy Golf to be ‘the best in the country’.

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Salford Lads Club, Manchester

Salford Lads Club

Hardly an unknown institution, the Salford Lads Club has benefited from a tenuous connection with a celebrated Manchester band. It is now a site of pilgrimage for Smiths fans who queue up to have their picture taken under the distinctive green and white sign.

We were drawn by an exhibition of photographs of the local area called “The Smiths is Dead: Iconic Images From the Dirty Old Town” held to mark the 20th anniversary of Stephen Wright’s Queen is Dead photo session. These were displayed in the pristine Billiard Room, complete with its original tables and fittings. The photographs explored the cultural past of the neighbourhood, and highlighted the area’s importance, not least as the location of the original Coronation Street and Rover’s Return pub, and its role in supplying an authentic ‘Northern’ backdrop to the film East is East.

It was here that we met an enthusiastic volunteer called Leslie Holmes who gave us a guided tour of the building. Next to the Billiard Room is a tiny office containing card file records of every single boy who has ever been a member of the club. This was a persistent theme throughout our visit - the organisers and volunteers have, throughout its history, kept impeccable records and documented just about every event that the club has organised, including photographs of every summer camping holiday - they seem to have always chosen Aberystwyth but I could be wrong. It was a joy to leaf through albums of group portraits year by year and spot faces that soon became familiar. One in particular, Archie, joined as a 12 year old, became a volunteer in later years, and has just been awarded an MBE for his ‘Lifetime voluntary service with young people at Salford Lads’ and Girl’s Club.’

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